More job trauma and drama

Dear Bloggy,

Egad, I am being 'reassigned' at work. I am waiting for the ax to fall.

Right now, it will be a test of nerves, steel, and determination. Will I quit? Will my boss fire me? Who is going to blink first?! Me me me.

In the meantime I am going to think of 1001 ways to say, I quit!

1.
boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: Status
Stick a fork in me, I"M DONE. I quit.


2.
boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: Status
So long. Farewell. Auf Wiedersehen, good night!
I quit I quit I quit this ghastly site!

3.
boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: status
day o day oooo daylight come and me quit my job
come mister tally man tally the project
nobody can count cause this economist go home

4.


boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: status

I think that I have never seen
a project unwieildy assigned to me

A project that you assigned in jest
Against all odds my very worst test

I quit now, so summer I will frolic

A series of unfortunate work events

Dear Bloggy,

Today was just terrible.

My day started off on the metro. As I stood up to exit the train, I heard a very strange sound. It sounded like a cat spitting up a very big fur ball. Well, it wasn't a cat that spit up.

Some poor gentleman blew chunks all over the train. Oh man, talk about foreshadowing.
You should have seen how fast people got out of the train! It was amazing. They wouldn't let the train leave the station until a hazmat team arrived.

And then my day went downhill from there. I was pestered to finish the project from hell. I am beginning to understand why some animals gnaw of their limbs to get out of traps. I am going to call in sick one day and say I have Ebola. I won't be coming back.

My day was so bad I need to create a list why this day was so bad:

1. Criticized for use of passive aggressive voice in writing.
2. Developed thicker layer of skin due to criticism at today's 4 hour discussion about my paper
3. I got caught behind a haze of ciggy smoke as I lept from the metro.
4. My boss noted that I do more editorial work than analytical! Wow, briliant observation buddy!
5. Considered quitting for the upteenth time. Totally imagined sending in my resignation e-mail.

boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: status

I quit.
OR

boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: I quit

I'm serious.


OR

boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: status

Paper not done
Project not done
I quit. Done I am. (Notice use of passive voice)

OR
boss@dolt.com
from a@dolt.com
re: status

Cherry blossoms bloom
Then they go away
Just like me....

If I were more disciplined I would learn how to write a haiku. I can't seem to control my urge to use passive voice in my writing. NOT! My boss wrote that section of the paper! God, I am working with dodos.