New Year's Resolutions

Dear Bloggy,

Here are my New Year's resolutions.

I am going

1. Start my Zombie novel...something I always wanted to write

2. Take a crack at Linear Algebra and Vector Calculus

3. Bid adieu to some depreciating assets

4. Develop mean streak to optimize my Machiavellian Potential at work

Goodbye 2007. You were a very very very bad year. I am going to toast 2008 with Moet et Chandon and to hell with everything else.

GRE part deux

I spent another $140 and took the GRE again. For that amount of money, I should have gotten a cappucino. Instead I got Union Workers protesting and screaming and pounding on Homer Buckets in front of the building. I could actually hear them as I took the exam. This was truly a special DC moment. NOT!

My score on the quantitative improved dramatically. However, my verbal score seemed to have dropped quite a bit. I think I got bored with the questions on the verbal side.

Anyways, I don't know what next year will bring. I hope it will be better than the last one.

Pencils

Once again I talk about pencils. I thought I needed them for the GRE. At the exam, I found out they provided the pencils, tissues, and a very nice locker to store my mechanical pencils.

I don't understand my obsession with sharp writing instruments. At this point in evening since I have run out of rum, I consider whether I should chuck everything and go to grad school for international studies.

I am just kidding about the rum. I am not kidding about the pencils.

Veni, Vidi, GRE

I survived the GRE. Afterword, I went to Caribou Coffee and got a mocha. I needed it.
Based on my scores, I think God truly has a sense of humor. I think I will have to retake it to get into the econ program. However, its all aces if I want to go to a Humanities program.

Well back to the drawing board.

Blog to God

Dear God help me with my upcoming GRE,

As I walk through the valley of GRE
I fear no quantitative analysis
For thou art with me when I do that section
Thy calculator and excel are may be at home
They comfort me even

I need to do well on quantitative so I get into the Phd program!

The aggravated economist

Things slow down in the government Thankgiving week. We yawn, we read the NYTIMES online, and we play chess. I was viciously taking away from a chess game due to a data call. My ex-officmate is currently answering most of the data calls that come into the office. She forwarded a tough case to me. I had to clean up the mess.

First she had confused them about what data were available, where they could find it, and how to download. It was so FUBU.

The data caller herself was a bit daft. First she spoke really really fast. Second she had a New Yawk accent. As a southerner I don't understand New York-ease.

I tried to help her I really did. I finally gave up explaining and told her I'd send her the stuff she needed via e-mail.

Economists are dangerous creatures

I left work around 7:30 PM last night. It was the proverbial dark and dreary night. As I walked to my metro station I heard this man yelling and screaming about women. I think someone just broke up with him. He said "Women are X#$! and women are $#%^" I realized that this guy is a total fruitloop. So I took out my mechanical pencil and was prepared to use it. Yes people, I was going to use my ergonomic mechanical pencil to gauge his eyes out if he dared mess with me. Luckily, I didn't have to use the pencil.

I think one lesson to learn is, "Don't mess with economists. They are usually armed with sharp writing instruments and not afraid to use them"

Crimes of knit and consequence

I have made some attempts at developing a hobby. Unfortuately, my efforts have been for naught. Here is a summary.

1. I tried weaving
bought lots of cute yarn
weaved about 30 rows
created some sort of unusable cup holder
promptly donated skeins to Goodwill for betterment of humanity

2. I tried glass art
bought cute paints
painted pictures on glass
developed skin allergy to glass paint
donated products to goodwill for betterment of humanity

3. I tried painting plant pots.
bought more cute paints
painted about 5 plant pots
developed severe case of boredom
products hanging out in craft graveyard in my junk room.

I think I should be banned from Michael's Craft Store for crimes against crafts and humanity.

Don't mess with my turkey, Dude!

I was leaving my beloved "wholesale club" last Friday when this nicely dressed men muttered something. I foolishly thought he was asking for directions. No he was me asking for money! I shook my head and said NO! And I thought that was the end of that!

Well, this guy starts following me to my car! I get freaked out and run back into my beloved "wholesale club." I tell this lady who works there about this guy and she calls the Police!!! Luckily there is an officer who is posted outside the store and he immediately chases the guy across the street.


I hang out at the store until the officer gets back. I am totally freaking out and then I realize I somehow I managed to hold onto my rotisserie turkey during my sprint back to the store!

The officer gets back and tells me this guy is a "regular" and a panhandler. He can't arrest him for reason x and reason Y. OK I understood that. I am glad the guy was shooed away from the store. I am happy the police officer was there and I am safe.

Well, this incident really provoked alot of thought. You really have to be on guard in the DC metropolitan area. You really can't let your guard down. I have to say that I'd really like to move home and not have to deal with this kind of stuff.

If things got really bad, I think I would have thrown my rotisserie turkey at the bad guy, kick him, and ran like hell. I learned from my favorite movie, Battle Royale that anything can make a good weapon!

Oblivious butt flickr

I was crossing the street going to Potbelly to get my turkey on when this 'oblivious butt flickr' almost threw her ciggy ashes onto my gorgeous wool jacket.

I didn't scream stop but gave a gutteral 'unnghhg nooo" and it stopped her in her tracks. My coat is OK thanks for asking.

This lady was totally oblivious. A few moments earlier she almost stepped right in front of a cab. Doesn't everybody know that DC cabbies are freaking insane?

I prey she doesn't have progeny. I don't think the world can handle that much stupid gene.

Weirdos and other strange attractors

I recently read a New York Times article about how some people feel like they attract weirdos in their life. For example, one person felt like they had random crazy people just go up and talk to them.

I feel kind of the same way. Except, I feel like an unusually high number of people try to save my soul. I get approached by soul savers all the time.

There was a super creepy guy at the metro station today. He wore a suit and approached me from the side. I was ready to Tai Bo kick him until he said the magic words, "Are you familiar with the Lord....."

Oh God!

Dude, don't prostyleze at me. You almost got kicked cause I thought you looked like you were going to corner me or something.

I think that this is about the 20th time someone has tried to save my soul. I don't understand why? Do I look like I need saving? Do they sense I am a Republican?

Unadulterated Carnage

I have many resolutions for 2007.

1. I am going to learn how to play Gears of War.

2. I will attract better pinatas to my pinata garden.

3. I will try Indian food again.

4. I will have a big fat juicy steak at a big schmancy steakhouse in DC

5. I will not join a bookclub.

6. I will get annoyed at the number of people who have noted how long my graduate program will take and laugh at them. Don't they know I am going to live till 125 years old?

7. I am going to get my multivariable calculus and differential equations on.

8. I am going to take more taxi rides. My last two metrorail rides ended in tears.

9. I promise I will get annoyed with my outlaws.

10. I will visit the far reaches of North Carolina.